In the Fermentor: Wood Aged Quadrupel-Imperial-Doppel-Barley-Weizen-Wee-Sour

Who says you can't have everything?

Well, I'm doing just that by creating a beer that combines the best aspects of eight big beer styles: Quadrupel, Imperial Stout, Doppelbock, Barleywine, Weizenbock and Wee Heavy.

But wait, there's more! The beer will be aged for year with everyone's favorite bacterias to make a Sour. On top of that, Sherry infused oak cubes will provide that little extra something.

A massive grain-bill, plus a healthy dollop of Candi Sugar should push the alcohol content up over 11%. Compensating for the strength is a biting combination of Noble, English and American hops.

A Decoction Mash gives the beer an extra bit of German character. Heavily caramelizing the First Runnings provides more depth of flavor than a standard boil. For that extra push over the cliff, 11 malts are working to make the beer one louder.

I'm giving this one at least a year of fermentation before I even touch it. Here's the five gallon recipe:

Grains:

4 lbs Colorado Malting 2-Row
4 lbs Weyermann Pale Wheat
3 lbs Simpsons Golden Promise
3 lbs Crisp Maris Otter
3 lbs Castle Pilsen
1 lb Weyermann Munich Light
12 oz Crisp Crystal 45
6 oz Castle Special B
6 oz Crisp Roasted Barley
6 oz Crisp Chocolate Malt
2 oz Weyermann Dehusked Carafa II

Hops:

Bittering:
1 oz Columbus (13.3% a.a.): 60 min
1 oz Hallertauer Magnum (14.9% a.a.): 60 min
1 oz Bullion (7.8% a.a.): 60 min

Flavor:
1 oz Falconer's Flight 7 C's (9.9% a.a.): 20 min
1 oz Hallertauer (3.9% a.a.): 20 min
1 oz Fuggles (4.8% a.a.): 20 min

Aroma 1:
1 oz Falconer's Flight 7 C's (9.9% a.a.): 5 min
1 oz Hallertauer (3.9% a.a.): 5 min
1 oz Fuggles (4.8% a.a.): 5 min

Aroma 2:
1 oz Falconer's Flight 7 C's (9.9% a.a.): Flame-out
1 oz Hallertauer (3.9% a.a.): Flame-out
1 oz Fuggles (3.9% a.a.): Flame-out

Dry-Hopping:
1 oz Falconer's Flight 7 C's (9.9% a.a.)
1 oz Hallertauer (3.9% a.a.)
1 oz Fuggles (4.8% a.a.)

Extras:
2 lbs Amber Homemade Candi Sugar: 5 min
1 oz Sherry Infused Oak Cubes (Secondary Fermentation)

Boil Time:
First Runnings: 90 min
Full Wort: 90 min

Mash Schedule:
Protein Rest: 122F for 20 min
Decoction: Heat and rest ~1/2 of mash at 155F for 20 min followed by a 15 min boil
Saccharification Rest: 154F for 60 min
Mashout: 168F for 15 minutes

Yeast:
Safale S-04 (Primary Fermentation)
Wyeast 3763 - Roeselare Ale Blend (Secondary Fermentation)

Original Gravity:
1.114
Estimated Final Gravity:
1.029

IBU: 140
SRM Color: 40

Fermentation Schedule:
3 Weeks Primary
12-36 Months Secondary
2 Weeks Bottle Conditioning

Cost: Seriously?
Commercial Equivalent: Really?
Savings: Religious or Otherwise?

Happy April Fool's Day everyone!